Elizabeth Gilbert (author of Eat Pray Love) recently posted this photo of herself on facebook. What’s remarkable about this photo is that it is distinctly unremarkable. Yet this is her living her dream.
She says:
“This photo captures exactly what I did for three straight years. I sat in a chair, reading books about botany, evolution, abolition, women’s history, missionaries, Dutch 18th century commerce, and more…in order to fill my brain (and index cards) with enough information to write that novel [The Signature of All Things].
There is no situation in which I could possibly be happier than this — submerged in the vocation that I love, vanishing for hours a day into my work.
Un-showered, greasy hair, eyes tired, totally falling down the rabbit hole of research…this is me, living my dream.”
In her facebook post she reveals she has turned away from many shiny and appealing paths in life…”because it was someone else’s dream.”
After the success of Eat Pray Love she turned down an offer to host her own TV show… “because it was someone else’s dream.”
She avoided hiring a team of personal assistants and consultants to help her “grow her brand”… “because it was someone else’s dream.”
It’s why she never had children.
Why she never took a good steady job teaching writing at a nice college.
Why she didn’t remain in Bali or Rome.
And why she turns down 99% of the invitations she receives to fancy parties and gatherings.
Someone else’s dream.
She even sold her “big beautiful house with its fabulous gardens and lovely library”… because one day she looked around at her gorgeous home and realised she was living someone else’s version of a wonderful life; not her own.
Wow.
This is a woman who remains steadfastly true to what is right for her, regardless of what anyone else thinks.
It’s so easy to be swayed by what we’re told we should want – money, status, job titles.
It’s so easy to get caught up in striving for approval, recognition and belonging.
For a long, long time I chased after all these things and the only thing it brought me was a permanent state of exhaustion! (If you’re wondering why it’s been a bit quiet on the blog front lately, now you know.)
After years spent striving to be remarkable, it has finally dawned on me in the last few weeks that I am enough as I am. And what I actually want and need most is a nice, simple, unremarkable life.
I can’t tell you what a relief this is!
Thank you to Elizabeth for reminding us that when it comes to success, the only definition to go by is your own. Not your family’s or your friend’s or society’s but your own heart-felt definition. Whatever weird and wonderful or unremarkable shape that takes.
Katherine Bassford 
Great post : ) So true! I’ve just been tested on this — I had an offer to do something BIG, something AMAZING… (with an art gallery overseas) and I seriously entertained the idea… BUT when I thought about the change in lifestyle and focus that it would mean, the answer was a very clear ‘no, it’s not for me’. It was very flattering, my feet didn’t touch the ground for a week, but it wasn’t a good fit. Since then, I’ve agreed to participate in a local art show next year instead. Shouldn’t I want the ‘bigger’ opportunity? Was fear holding me back? No — it was, as you say, simply not my dream : ) Anna
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Anna, thanks so much for sharing that – that’s a great example of being true to yourself and NOT living someone else’s dream! Congratulations on the amazing offer (even though it wasn’t for you) and even bigger congrats on the local art show :-)
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Reblogged this on Zee Southcombe and commented:
I sat down to write a blog post today, and hoped that reading some of my favourite blogs would give me a hint of inspiration. This post did more than that.
I reflected during my journal writing today that part of my progress is a shift towards doing more of what I love, and what I used to do lots of.
This post, from Katherine Bassford, is a summary of Elizabeth Gilbert’s life decisions based on what HER dream is – not what other people think it should be. It’s a timely reminder that dreams and success are as unique as each of us are.
Thanks, Katherine, for a brilliant post.
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I’ve reblogged this – I sat down to write a blog post today, and hoped that reading some of my favourite blogs would give me a hint of inspiration. This post did more than that.
I reflected during my journal writing today that part of my progress is a shift towards doing more of what I love, and what I used to do lots of.
This post, from Katherine Bassford, is a summary of Elizabeth Gilbert’s life decisions based on what HER dream is – not what other people think it should be. It’s a timely reminder that dreams and success are as unique as each of us are.
Thanks, Katherine, for a brilliant post.
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Zee, it has seriously made my day to know that my blog post helped you. Thank you for reblogging it… here’s to doing more of what you love!!
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Yes! Much, much more of doing what we love – because WE love it, not because we think we should :-)
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